"Give me that arm! Give me that arm!" , she squeaked.
"No! No! No!" Lily squeaked back.
Serious for a minute, Ronda turned to her friend and said in disgust,
"Can you believe that girl? What a coward! She was holding on to that arm like, like - "
"Like you were going to break it if she let go?" Lily helpfully suggested, laughing.
"Well, yeah, but -- "
Attitudes like this are not limited to Ronda, nor to teenagers. Recently, I had a discussion over twitter with Alan who complained that Brendan Schaub's match was "disrespectful" and that it was hard for his opponent, a world champion, to beat him if he wouldn't come into his guard.
I thought it was funny, myself. If you are a multiple world gold medalist competing against a brown belt, you should be able to have your way with him, not be complaining that he didn't fight the way you wanted him to.
I completely understand how frustrating and annoying that can be, and I am a little bit of a hypocrite because I have also complained about people being cowards, not willing to fight me at my own game - but really, why should they? People have gotten up from matwork and literally ran away from me to keep the match standing. The same has happened to Ronda. If someone is competing against a person known to be excellent on the ground and they manage to keep the game standing, that isn't being a coward, it's being smart.
It's YOUR JOB to take them to the mat and keep them there and your opponent is certainly under no obligation to make it easy for you.
Jim Pedro and I talked about this a lot when we wrote Winning on the Ground. Although we both focus on both types of transition, mine is more on transition from standing to matwork, while his is more on transition from one mat technique to another.
Don't complain that your opponent won't come to you on the mat. Get up and take them to the mat. Don't complain the referee doesn't give you time to work your mat techniques (yes, I'm talking to YOU, judo players!) Get the grip you need while standing and then transition to your mat technique while you are in the air. If your opponent escapes from mat work don't complain that he or she didn't stay and let you try an arm bar.
If your opponent is making it difficult for you to win - well what the hell did you expect? That's why they're called opponents and not "partners".
I am surprised that I have to explain this to you.