Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Warning Labels on People

I was talking to Samantha the other day about someone who had a co-worker who was pretty much a psychopath. She asked why would a person choose to work with anyone like that and I said,

It's not as if people come with warning labels - which is an oversight, if you think of it, because there is not much that needs a warning label more than people.

Which got me to thinking, what would be warning signs to stay away from a person? Keep in mind what a warning label is - it tells you that there is an above average probability that a bad thing would happen if you use this product. Not everyone who smokes cigarettes will get cancer but the odds are not in your favor.

So, as a public service, here are my warning labels for people.

  1. Hangs out with unethical dirt bags. If you like Bob but he has more than one friend who is dishonest, lazy and/or cruel that is a warning those traits don't bother Bob so much, or he wouldn't have multiple friends like that. You have been warned.
  2. Treats certain people badly. Bob may be super nice and friendly to you but he is rude to his parents, spouse, assistant or students. This is the old parental advice, "If your date is nice to you but rude to the waiter he/she is not a nice person." You have been warned.
  3. Cheats in relationships. People can find true love and change, I've seen it happen, but it is not the way to bet. In particular, if someone cheats on YOU in a relationship, drop them and run.
  4. Anyone over the age of 25 who is unemployed living with his or her parents. Statisticians know that the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. If Moochy has managed to get by to this point leeching off other people, when the Bank of Mom and Dad closes up shop, you are the next leech-ee .
So, those are my first four signs. Anyone else want to chime in?

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Unknown said...

My grandmother always use to say to me never be with someone that doesn't treat their animals or other animals around them right because you'll never know what they will be like around children

Anonymous said...

Good points. I would add: Avoid people not open to new things or learning new things.

A person doesn't need to be a brainiac or need to be open to every single new thing, but I find people who are not open to change or learning tend to not mature as they grow older, which can eventually become tiresome.

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Ventus said...

I think i can offer a few... But It is pretty hard to figure out very early warnings about people. Earlier then those you mention in the post mrs. DeMars.

Usually it takes getting into situations with them where they show their real worth and then that can be understood as a mistake one makes for letting them get so far... but i dont think one should them blame him or herself for it. Instead, one needs to learn the lesson and move on, improved.

Because it is literally impossible not to make any mistakes in life and all that is important is how one reacts to them. What happens next.

For me, i think that the worst people are those that are completely convinced that they know absolutely everything, that are absolutely certain about whatever subject or event or anything at all - regardless of how much they actually know about any of it. Which is usually very little or nothing at all since once you get convinced you know everything you stop learning anything.

Those kind of people just basically invent some kind of excuse for themselves - to feel good about themselves or whatever they are thinking, and then that turns into aggression and doing anything at all to keep that feeling. Very similar to how junkies operate, really.

The people that are like that can be recognized by several features.

- They seem completely certain about themselves 100% of the time.

- have absolute declarations about any possible subject at all, regardless how true or dumb or ignorant those declarations are. Because they like know everything, right?

- completely incapable to change their opinion when they are definitely wrong about something. Instead they go for attacking whoever or whatever is against their opinion.

- completely incapable of admitting they were wrong or made a mistake.

- completely incapable of any kind of empathy.

- completely incapable of hanging out with people who are actual experts in some field or science or anything.

I know that girls and women find someone who is certain of himself attractive, but there has to be some limit to that "certainty" - some balance to it. The extreme of it i am trying to describe above isnt really any kind of intelligence, but its opposite.

One can be certain he doesnt know everything too, as Socrates was fond of saying. And then learn something and improve him or herself.

The second type would be the... the "plugs", as we call them here. Like an electrical plug that goes into electrical... sockets? (i think im getting the expressions right there) And when the power runs out in one they just plug into another.

We also have an expression that uses a type of a sea shell name for it, but i dont think its directly translatable to English so ill go for "barnacles" that mr White mentioned recently. Very similar thing.

As you grow and get to be a part of different groups of friends as a kid, teenager and later on, you always get one or two of "plugs" in some of those groups. I think most of us do... but maybe i was just unlucky. Still, the few ive known provided a very good training for recognizing the symptoms.

They are very easy to figure out.

All you need to do is try and get them to hang out with you while there is nothing fun or entertaining or advantageous to do or anything to consume.

A plug cannot tolerate that. Its like offering garlic to vampires. And you will see them evaporating.

Now, some of those people may not be completely bad, and have some redeeming qualities or moments, but that doesnt mean their basic form will change, so... if you know some like that, keep them at a safe distance.

Anonymous said...

Hated by animals - Trust your pets instincts. If your loyal and loving pet suddenly goes crazy in the company of Bob or Susan then you have been warned. It would be easier to listen to family members but since swimming up stream appears to be the option of choice - we add the pet 'goto' label for those that required extra feedback. ;-)